Comments on: Bear, or not?

By: me

me — Fri, 28 Mar 2008 15:14:00 +0000

to what Mike said above on the learned vs genetic question i think it’s a bit of both. my friends often accuse me of being overly social when we’re on vacation (they also say i am not discerning enough but at least i meet people) and i’m going to tell you it’s not always easy to do the walk up and talk to someone thing. first of all it takes a bit of guts (more so if you are trying to pick up rather than just chat) but at the same time i always think “what am i so afraid of and what is the worst that could happen”. worst case is they’re a douche and you excuse yourself (which says bad things about them) or they turn out to be in the same boat and are glad someone came up to talk to them. that being said i am sometimes a wall flower and prefer to just watch. mingling is a skill and like any other skill it takes work and practice. and erik, you are an interesting guy (if you weren’t i wouldn’t keep stalking your blog) who at a minimum can always comment on someone’s ink to spark the conversation.

plus what do you have to lose? odds are you’ll probably never see the douches again. best case you’ll make a new friend.

By: mark

mark — Thu, 27 Mar 2008 03:30:43 +0000

I’m sorry that we didn’t get a chance to meet this past weekend. We were out and about to a lot of the events. Maybe one of these times.

By: Erik Rubright

Erik Rubright — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 11:35:19 +0000

Mike:
I am always in awe of people (like both our other halves) who can just walk up to a complete stranger and be, well, them! I don’t know if it’s learned or genetic.

I’m going to be one of those people we see sitting on the benches at the mall watching people when I get archaic, I just know it.

By: Erik Rubright

Erik Rubright — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 11:25:24 +0000

Sorted:
But everyone should remember me!… he he.

I need to learn to be able to walk up to random strangers, lower my shields and then engage them in conversation. It’d be easier if everyone had a computer with them though…

By: Alexander

Alexander — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 13:51:27 +0000

Unfortunately, I can offer no advice, because we seem to be cut from the same cloth.

Although, many…MANY…years ago, when I was still frequenting bars and other nefarious HO-MO-seksual hangouts that a surefire way to get laid–or at least meet people–was to make the first move. Yeah, sure, there were many times I got rejected, but by and large I never had a real problem, um…”meeting” people. The secret lies in the fact that everyone ELSE is waiting around for someone to make that first move, so chances are good that if you summon the courage to go up to a perfect stranger and strike up a conversation, good things will happen.